Chess to CHAZ

In June 2020, Seattle, Washington was stormed by a mob called “CHAZ” (The Capitol Hill Autonomy Zone). I wrote this, and posted it on Facebook while they were having a grand ol’ time with their self-proclaimed “sovereign nation” which the loony leftist City tolerated for far too long. SMH!

 

How to turn a Chess game into a CHAZ game.

(1) Replace Kings with “Thronedwellers” which are not gender-specific nor intimidating.

(2) Replace Queens with “Assistant Thronedwellers” likewise.

(3) Replace Bishops (bearing crosses) with “Spiritual Advisors” (bearing “coexist” logos) to be all-inclusive.

(4) Change the Knight pieces from horses to bulls, because bull best describes the CHAZ ideology.

(5) Change the Rook pieces from castles to Space Needle skyscrapers, not only because CHAZ is in Seattle, but mainly because their minds are always in outer space.

(6) Rename the Pawns anything you wish, but please don’t keep that term. “Pawn” sounds too much like capitalism and private enterprise.

(7) Last but not least, if the player with the white pieces wins the game, he must apologize for oppressing his opponent with the black pieces, then surrender all his money and property.

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